What to do When
the Patient Refuses to
Go to the Doctor


  • Schedule the visit for them and accompany them.  Be firm in the way you present the appointment and present it as fact, not choice.  (We are going to the doctor this morning.")
  • Tie something the person enjoys doing to the visit to the doctor.  ("After we see the doctor, we can go to lunch.")
  • Depending on the individual, you may want to inform them of the appointment the week before, the day before, the hour before, or just after you get into the car.
  • Use another reason, other than memory loss, for the check-up, e.g., check your blood pressure, flu shot, get prescription refilled, etc.
  • Enlist the aid of other family members or trusted friends and advisors who may be able to convince the person that a check-up is needed.
  • Validate their fears and agree with their arguments.  ("I know you are healthy and don't feel you need to see a doctor, but I would feel so much better knowing you have a clean bill of health.")
  • If the person is afraid of an Alzheimer's diagnosis, reassure them that there are many other treatable things that cause memory loss.
  • Try not to argue about or have lengthy discussions that will only increase the person's resistance to going.
  • Tell your loved one that you need to go to the doctor and ask them to come along.  (The caregiver can get blood pressure checked or something simple at the actual visit to make the person feel more at ease.)
  • Tell them that the insurance company is requiring a check-up for insurance renewal.
  • Ask the physician to call them to schedule an appointment.
  • Call ahead or write down your concerns (specific signs and symptoms you have noticed) and give them to the doctor ahead of time if you don't want to discuss them in front of your loved one.
  • Try to get the person's appointment for the first appointment of the day (to reduce waiting time) or at the time of the day when the person is least agitated.